ITIL, it's easy to understand, isn't it???

Well after the months of work that the IT department have spent invested in ITIL, we have now launched our service catalog to the rest of the business. However I personally hope that no-one actually reads it as it is just completely rubbish.
We have specified a set of SLAs that we will aim to meet, however if you read them through they don't mean anything to the business. For example, we have a number of SLAs for responding to voice-mails that hit the helpdesk, SLAs for getting that information logged as a call and SLAs for support teams to assign people those calls. So for example, a user phones the helpdesk and gets through to the voicemail, they report a server down, which should get logged as a Priority 1. The helpdesk now has 30mins to pick up that voicemail and once they do, they have another 30 mins to get that logged as a call and assigned to a support team. That support team has 10 mins from the time the call is logged to assign it to someone on their team. That team member then has.....
Hold on no they don't, all relevant SLAs have been met, the team member doesn't then have to do anything, there is no commitment to contact the user, no SLA for fix times etc. I do think that someone has missed the point here of what ITIL is about.
As I said if the users do actually read the Service catalog closely, they are going to realise that they are being screwed big time!!!